I believe that the unseen is more tangibly felt and real than what is seen with our eyes. So when a person is saying they feel heavy and stuck that means something that we cannot see is both pulling them down and at the same time holding them back.
There can be many reasons to feel this way, in this blog I will mention one.
When we hold onto a grudge or action another person has committed against them and refuse to release them we are harming ourselves, not the other person. The more people we do this to, the more we are carrying.
By holding resentment and focusing on that wrong we are choosing to give that person power over us, which means for us to make choices in our lives they are included in that decision making process.
We are essentially carrying that person AND the pain AND the event with us day in and day our just like baggage.
Forgiveness does NOT mean:
What they did or said is ok
That you have to trust them again
That they won't have natural negative consequences to their behavior\
That you have to have a relationship with them
That you have to forget
Forgiveness does mean:
You are free
You are letting the pain and past go
You are releasing that person from owing you anything
You choose not to let anger and thoughts of harm linger in your thoughts
You choose to heal and move forward from the pain
You choose to love yourself
You choose mercy and grace
It takes more courage, strength, and integrity to forgive than it takes to not forgive. Forgiveness isn't blind or disregarding of the pain involved, but feels, grieves and weeps from the wounds inflicted. In this way healing is found and experience and wisdom.
I have personally found and discovered that those that hold onto unforgiveness are not pleasant or inspiring to be around, but the opposite is true as well. Those that dismiss pain and injury and disregard the damage done are also equally as uninspiring.
What is needed is to be seen, heard, known, and loved. To acknowledge the depth of pain, feel it, and then release the person who inflicted it.
When you make this choice to forgive, it has been my personal experience a flood of clarity, lightness, and blocks are magically removed before me.
Who comes to mind when you think of the word "forgiveness"?
Can I encourage you to spend some time processing and making that difficult choice to set yourself free?